I think I am getting paranoid about these SUKKAH lofts..I slept miserably last night, but went outside today in an optimistic mood.then I heard the faint jangle of Jewish sounding music in the distance..up 2nd Avenue..I started walking quickly and a hasidic jew holding a branch was running towards me! I raced across the street towards the library..No one else seemed to notice him..Then I saw the source of the music-an old man playing a casio keyboard in front of the meat market. I asked him if he was jewish and he looked at me oddly and said "NO." He was just playing some random tune..I have to get over this SUKKAH business and pull myself together. It's like The Sixth Sense, which starred a young Haley Joel Osment before he began drawing penis's(what's the plural of PENIS?) in the snow everywhere..I felt like whispering to the old man, "I see Jewish people. Walking around like regular people. They don't see each other. They only see what they want to see. They don't know they're Jewish."
Old Man: How often do you see them?
Me, voice barely audible: All the time. They're everywhere.
SCENE CUTS TO A SUKKAH WITH A SKULL AND CROSSBONES ON IT, BLOOD OOZING OUT OF THE OPEN, STRANGELY WELCOMING DOOR..Be Afraid!!!!!!!
Anycooch, here's another stall in the Tompkins bathroom..There seems to be a war brewing between the East Coast and West Coast Junkies in the park. Speaking of which..I saw a young crusty kid taken out of the bathroom in a stretcher..I think he was okay-he had an oxygen thing on his face. Yeesh. it's getting cold, kids. Go down south and stop doing drugs! How much of a good time can you have watching your friends going out in front of you. Bah.
There's the Casio Man in front of the Meat Market. He was swell. Then at Ray's, one of those annoying tour buses drove by with "Just Married" on the front of it..I thought the bus had just married another bus..but alas, some couple had probably tied the knot that day. I yelled out "Divorce coming in six months!" but everyone was cheering and yelling weird stuff at the bus so it was kinda loud. Jay and Melanie warned them that MOSHIACH was coming soon!
I also noticed an organic dry cleaning place has just opened on 9th st by Avenue A. What exactly do they do to your clothes? Who knows..But that woman orgasmically splashing hydrochloric acid on her face looks like a good time. And look at their happy fancy-pants customers! I like that sign-It seems vaguely threatening..YOU WILL BE NEXT!..Oh no!!! I just had a SUKKAH flashback,,Okay. I'm okay now...breathe in..breathe out..
Well, i've started answering ads on craigslist for extras acting work and stuff..If Angelina can do it, so can I! That should be fun to write about. And I'm waiting for my Mini-Chill free sample to arrive. I was contacted by their company today because they just LOVE my blog and are huge fans. I can't WAIT to review it. I think hijinks just may ensue...